The cycle of romance unemployed older women left out of the "double loss"
- Details
- Category: Ningbo News
- Published: Wednesday, 20 June 2012 14:47
Source 2012-6-20 9:09:40 Ningbo Evening News
This day and age, never missing and the "remainder" on the topic. In the eyes of ordinary people, this part of the population is highly educated, high wages and high demand on behalf of them the sum of "Literature", "petty bourgeoisie" linked, even if the event of marriage is not forthcoming, but their life is still wonderful.
However, not all of the "remainder" are unlucky in the workplace pride. Quietly around us such a "double surplus" groups, they are not only paying job, and go quite rough in the situation on the road, what is more love to give up their jobs when they had chosen that person has left own lopsided.
One and all for love to wander
Work the feelings of two vast
"At first I wanted to wander for the love, I did not expect a person, came to a strange city, the result is far not as I had wanted to." 30-year-old, both an opening on the self-deprecating "older pairs left Girl. "
Both in the university campus and her boyfriend had a romantic time of 4 years. After graduation, both back home Jinhua, a business unit of work, her boyfriend from Hangzhou back to Ningbo, the factory at home to help.
25 years old, both quit their home, work came to Ningbo, while a clerk in a company, while on Taobao from the shop, selling boyfriend's home factory products. Seeing Taobao's business is getting better, and both will simply quit her job to concentrate on care of the business of online.
I thought that two people can stay together long-term. The reality happens it did not, the parents of the man firmly opposed to their marriage to both is no formal job. But also both disappointed that the boyfriend, his own attitude is also a swing, when it comes to marriage evasive, and later even both of the phone are not willing to take.
In desperation, both only boyfriend, and even his own business up shop and hand over. Both not thought about back home, can be very difficult to find the original so good work, stay in Ningbo, both find themselves there is no circle of friends.
"I do not understand now, the beginning, to the feelings of abandon the cause, why reduced to the point where nothing today?" In the end go from here, both are one confused.
Can not play the social role
Caught in a vicious cycle vicious circle
Older woman left, why would the workplace and in love at the same time fall into a passive situation? National secondary counselors Yang Na analysis, makes it easy for women in facing the challenges of the workplace and in love, negative emotional attitudes affect work status, emotional instability are also greatly reduced the work effect, creating a vicious cycle.
Modern society, many women are still subject to the impact of traditional, often emotional balance more tilted to the family. "Said Yang Na, feelings and give up work, many women tend to have greater psychological expectation that the man should be redouble to compensate for their own good, to bring more pressure to the man. Once the man the actual performance and their own psychological expectations gap, the woman prone to a sense of loss, more feel unfortunate.
In addition, older unmarried young women in the job easier to run into a wall. In many cases, marriageable women marry and have children, will give others leave a stable, cheerful impression to the contrary, it may cause a lot of speculation, thereby negating their ability to work, the impact of job and promotion objective, resulting in a "double surplus" phenomenon.
Development interests
Consolidate the economic base
Older pairs of women left the face of temporary difficulties in the feelings and workplace, whether it is a sad depressed, complaining, or doubt their own abilities, not the performance of a mature society should, how to prevent the negative emotions spread, to avoid the workplace, in love, "both frustrated" situation?
Yang Na said, if it is encountered in the career development bottleneck, we might find another higher platform for the development, if it is emotionally two different concepts may wish to communicate in good faith to sit down and rationally make a choice.
For career women, the most taboo is to mix work and feelings of the uncontrolled to allow the spread of negative emotions, to not only emotionally can not find the attribution can also lead to dissatisfaction with leadership and colleagues. At the same time, as far as possible the development of one or two hobbies, to expand their circle of communication. The more people know, the greater the likelihood to find the partner.
Finally, pairs of older women left more financial sense studied under some of the funds or fixed-investment projects, there are certain economic basis as a safeguard, the mind's sense of security will be higher when dealing with emotional and life issues, will seem quite unashamedly, at ease.
